I'm Drained

I haven't posted here in a long time. I've retreated to the comfort of my moleskine for expression of emotions. I am drained emotionally right now. News came today that they have taken my Grandma off her meds and are just making her comfortable. What must be running through her head? I can't even begin to understand the thought process of someone who fully understands that the last few days of their life will be spent in a hospital bed. That scares me... My gran is over 70, so she has led a long life. Yet, it reinforces my fear of dying. I hate facing my mortality; I'm afraid that one day I will wake up unable to do the things I love and enjoy. Traveling for instance. Some say its crazy that I spend so much time, money and energy on travel, but I say "God gave us this earth, I want to see it!" I'm not saying that everyone has to travel, I'm just saying find something that fulfills your life. For me, it is soaking up the beauty of God's creation with the people I love. Others it may be listening to music and reading books. Maybe it's spending that quite afternoon in the arms of the man/woman you love. Whatever it is, enjoy it. Life is too short to be consumed by the rat race.... even if you live to 100.